Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Long Live the Loonie!

Apart from its trading value (which is practically on par now anyway), the Canadian currency trumps the US by far (in my openly biased opinion)!

I never realized it until I lived here, and started to deal with US bills daily, how much of a hassle they can be.

My first issue is with the colour.  The "mean green" just really isn't working for me.  Why do they have to be all the same!?  It makes it so much more confusing (and time consuming) when riffling through your wallet, having to look at each bill, just to find a $5.  I usually end up having to pull out the entire wad of bills (which is thick due to the mass amounts of $1 bills collected in change).  It may appear as though I am rolling in ca$h money, but really it is only a very small amount (I assure you).  It does look like you're an impressive and responsible money-saver when you're out to lunch with your boss, but not so great on the busy streets of New York.  I especially hate it when I'm trying to refill my subway pass...there's always an abundance of suspicious characters lurking around down there.  I feel their beady little eyes staring at me as I try to feed money into the machine. (or maybe I'm just paranoid...it's a toss up)

It was so much more convenient when I could do a quick glance and pull out a bill based on colour alone.  Call me a money-racist if you will, but it saves a girl a lot of trouble!

My other beef is with the lowly $1 Bill.  They are the most useless bills of all. Not to mention a safety hazard. (Papercuts, hello!?)  Trying to feed it into a vending machine is such a challenge!  It has to be face up a certain way and perfectly smooth with no bent corners (which all of mine invaribly are).  The machine makes an awful noise & promptly rejects it if it doesn't meet the criteria.  So much easier when you could just drop in a loonie and call it a day.  The clinking noise is oddly satisfying as well.  You miss out on that musical interlude with paper.  Just sayin'.

As I mentioned previously, they're also incredibly deceiving little buggers.  You may think you have enough cash to buy that new shirt...but you could be wrong.  For example, if you open up your wallet at the counter (after waiting in line forever) and realize what you thought was a bunch of tens were just a large pack of ones. ...aaand that it's a "cash only line" is just the cherry on top.
This sort of embarrassment would be avoided if the ones were clearly separated in the change pouch (ie. LOONIES).  Hypothetically speaking of course...not like that's ever happened to me or anything.

$1 bills are also sneaky devils when taking a taxi (which is a frequent occurance here).  You sometimes may be left pondering if that was indeed a bunch of $1 bills you gave the cab driver, or if there were some extra 0's that snuck in.  Especially tricky if you're coming home late after a night on the town. (Again, hypothetically speaking of course.  I'm always in bed by 9pm and am allergic to fun.)

I'm sure that cab drivers (and strippers) are very content with the lack of colour discrepancy and $1 Bill situation.  No wonder Vegas is such a lucrative career destination.  $1 bills are great for business!  No one is tossin' loonies in cleavage. (Although the comparison to a coin slot is quite accurate).

...Now that I think about it, maybe my boss wasn't impressed by my saving skills, and just now assumes that I moonlight as a stripper on the side.  Yikes.

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